


'Til the End of the Line

by BuckysBabe



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, heartbreak?, im sorry im sad so this is what happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-04
Updated: 2016-10-04
Packaged: 2018-08-19 14:44:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8212589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BuckysBabe/pseuds/BuckysBabe
Summary: A long, long time ago when Bucky had been lost and drowning in the unforgiving sea of his memories and nightmares he'd found you. And you'd saved him. He'd held onto you with all of his being and, by some weird cosmic mistake, you accepted him and held on to him just the same. But somewhere along the line he'd let go. Instead of you, Bucky now smiled at someone else. Instead of you, Bucky now kissed someone else. Instead of you, Bucky touched – held—someone else. But worst of all instead of you, Bucky loved someone else.Maybe it had happened during all the time he had spent away from you on missions and stake-outs. Maybe it had happened during all the time Bucky had spent piecing his life together again – a life without space for you.Or maybe it had just happened.





	

**Author's Note:**

> For the first time in years I felt like writing something again so I figured why not embrace hell in its most ultimate form and write about Bucky breaking your heart? I’m sorry....
> 
> Also, just a quick disclaimer - this work is a rewrite of something I posted several years ago on different platforms and from different accounts!

A long, long time ago when Bucky had been lost and drowning in the unforgiving sea of his memories and nightmares he'd found you. And you'd saved him. He'd held onto you with all of his being and, by some weird cosmic mistake, you accepted him and held on to him just the same. But somewhere along the line he'd let go. Instead of you, Bucky now smiled at someone else. Instead of you, Bucky now kissed someone else. Instead of you, Bucky touched – held – someone else. But worst of all instead of you, Bucky loved someone else.

Maybe it had happened during all the time he had spent away from you on missions and stake-outs. Maybe it had happened during all the time Bucky had spent piecing his life together again – a life without space for you.

Or maybe it had just happened.

The worst things was that you still stayed by Bucky's side. You waited for him to come home every single night, even though you knew he was away with someone else. Still, you only had eyes for Bucky even though you knew he was looking at someone else. You still called him every evening to check in with him, you still texted him throughout the day just to bring a smile to his face but you could see it was starting to wear thin. Bucky didn’t hold you like he used to. Bucky didn’t kiss you like he used – in fact, you couldn’t even remember the last time he had told you that he loved you. And it hurt. It hurt a lot.

The two of you had fallen into a routine as of late; Bucky went for a run with Steve in the morning and to train with Natasha in the afternoon. He spent his evenings with her doing god-knows-what and then he came back to your shared apartment in the Avengers tower late at night, ready to sneak into bed where no doubt you had fallen asleep waiting up for him.

Today, however, was a break from your usual routine; Bucky came home much earlier than he usually did and he found you sitting at the dining table, your chin resting on your hands while deep in thought. You looked up at the sound of Bucky coming through the door and pierced him with a withering glare. Bucky threw you a nervous smile, which you didn't reciprocate and it only managed to unsettle him more. Bucky always prided himself in knowing what you were thinking but right now, in this very moment, he was entirely unsure of what exactly was going through your mind. You noticed his confusion and with a tired smile pointed at the seat opposite you, which thankfully he took without asking another question.

A few tense and awkward minutes, at least on Bucky's behalf, passed before you opened your mouth and spoke for the very first time that night.

“I want you to stop playing around, Buck. We both know what’s going. I just want to know why?” you said in an eerily calm voice, looking directly and unwaveringly into Bucky's eyes. He sat there silently with his heart in his throat. He'd never expected to have this kind of conversation with you of all people. You were always so understanding and kind that Bucky would have never thought you would confront him about anything at all – no matter how bad things got. Obviously he had been wrong on that account...

When Bucky didn’t answer you carried on.

“We pretend like everything’s fine and dance around the subject all the time. You wake up and kiss me goodbye before you leave to go to her.... and then you have the nerve to come home to me and hold me like I'm your best girl?!” you asked growing increasingly angry.

Bucky had never seen this side of you and quite frankly he didn't even know it existed. Hearing the anger in your voice, he finally appreciated that he had taken full advantage of this wonderful woman who loved him unconditionally and wholeheartedly and now, to put it mildly, it was coming back to bite him in the ass. He swallowed, trying to suppress the lump in his throat that was making it impossible to speak.

“I-I’m sorry Y/N.... I don’t know why it started – I don't even remember exactly when it started – but it did. I don't know... She used to fight, you know? FBI, CIA, SWAT. That kind of thing.... Maybe she reminds me of you... she's a therapist now and I met her in one of my sessions... I wish I could take it back... I’m so sorry, doll...” Bucky whispered brokenly as he looked at the table. He was scared to look up, to look into your eyes, to see how much you hated him, to see how much you hurt – all because of him.

Bucky was startled out of his thoughts when you suddenly banged your fist on the table. Bucky looked up at him and only then noticed that tears were streaming down your face. It finally hit him how much he'd hurt Y/N and how even now, so close to the end, he was doing nothing but breaking your heart because of his selfishness. How he'd toyed with someone’s heart because of his own pathetic desires.

“Buc- James... I can’t do this anymore. I’m tired of pretending that it doesn’t bother me when it breaks my heart every second I look at you. I’m tired of pretending I’m fine every day when all I wanna do is just break down. I’m tired... I'm just so tired of it all James....” You admitted in a defeated voice, though the steely resolve in your eyes hadn't wavered one bit.

“I’m so, so sorry doll…” Bucky whispered again, his eyes downcast and hands clenched together in fists. There was nothing else he could say.

“I can’t do this anymore. I want you to leave and I want you to never come back. I don’t want to see you here ever again, James.” you told Bucky firmly as you wiped the last of your tears away with the back of your hand. You calmly got up, walked around the table and held the door open for him. He simply nodded and got up, too ashamed to say a word, let alone look you in the eyes. To be completely honest Bucky considered himself lucky since he knew he deserved much worse than you were giving him. Bucky was the lowest of the low – he was a cheater.

As Bucky walked past you, you gently grabbed his shoulder and turned him around. He saw that your delicate features were ugly and twisted with pain, with heartache, and it hurt him to know that he was the one that caused it all. It hurt Bucky to know that this would be his last memory of Y/N.

“Just promise me that you’ll stay with her… And that you won't do this to her.... I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy so please just stay true to her…” you told Bucky in a low voice before you let him go. He couldn't make himself look at you so he just nodded and then crossed the threshold of the apartment he'd shared with you for the very last time – the sound of the door closing behind him echoing long into the night.


End file.
